Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
my vag is so smooth its legendary
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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