Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
