She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
