i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
