I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Let's get the cat blown out
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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