If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize