So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize