oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
