yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
