All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize