yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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