Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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