This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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