He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
