ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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