What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
