On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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