Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
