Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Randomize
