remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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