I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize