Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
