My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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