In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
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