how can u be prego again
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
