Texts From Last Night

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  (513): View more from Ohio

  what's Bukake?

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  a bad idea.

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  (513): what's Bukake? (1-513): a bad idea. http://tfl.nu/i91o
  Replies (31) Good night (1275) Bad night (2934)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.

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  (480): So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction. http://tfl.nu/bt6f
  Replies (54) Good night (694) Bad night (4260)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.

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  (513): Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies. http://tfl.nu/w2rz
  Replies (33) Good night (692) Bad night (2885)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love

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  (214): She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love http://tfl.nu/tjul
  Replies (51) Good night (19864) Bad night (802)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on

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  (416): I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on http://tfl.nu/c1eq
  Replies (19) Good night (5279) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff

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  (562): I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff http://tfl.nu/dgtn
  Replies (12) Good night (927) Bad night (3730)
• Favorite

  (830): View more from Texas

  Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.

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  (830): Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk. http://tfl.nu/y7vc
  Replies (15) Good night (1326) Bad night (3729)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....

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  (773): I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician.... http://tfl.nu/qln8
  Replies (14) Good night (910) Bad night (3487)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.

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  (607): Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating. http://tfl.nu/yfie
  Replies (4) Good night (5134) Bad night (961)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?

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  (314): At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving? http://tfl.nu/o7j4
  Replies (10) Good night (4296) Bad night (849)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes

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  (812): Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes http://tfl.nu/54ik
  Replies (8) Good night (633) Bad night (1969)
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  (325): View more from Texas

  I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?

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  (325): I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good? http://tfl.nu/0pjz
  Replies (3) Good night (593) Bad night (958)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol

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  (814): Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol http://tfl.nu/gohb
  Replies (5) Good night (806) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?

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  (814): Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass? http://tfl.nu/jyz9
  Replies (8) Good night (1387) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"

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  (310): I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine" http://tfl.nu/hod3
  Replies (7) Good night (747) Bad night (337)

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