It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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