similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
