my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
You can't just leave with hair like that
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
