I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
