If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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