i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
