guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
