I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize