i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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