I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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