you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
