How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
