yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
