If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
