Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
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Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
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My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.