I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
