she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
