do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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