Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize