Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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