ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
