dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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