I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
