Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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