So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize